The End of the Adoption Journey to Nowhere

This will be my final post on this blog. We are moving toward a new chapter in our lives and think it only fitting to write the last page of this story. Not a single day goes by that we don't think about Alex, Stas, or Stephen (and his baby brother whom we never met, but prayed for just as much) and our pregnancy certainly hasn't changed that. I dream of the boys at night and think of them throughout the day. They will always be a part of our lives. God knows we did everything humanly possible to make it have a happy ending, but were met with constant road blocks, closed doors, and unwilling or unmotivated "powers that be". I don't know if it is best for the boys to never know about what transpired or if someday it is best for them to know that somebody desperately wanted them. Only time will bring that answer.

We have learned a lot during this journey. Some of the lessons were positive: our marriage survived and thrived through both public and private pain. Some were negative: We learned that some "friends" are not as true as they seem. Some were just "life lessons" that can't really be neatly placed in one category. One of these is the fact that no matter what issue it is: adoption, abortion, racism, gay marriage, animal rights - you name it - there are extreme viewpoints on both sides and most people are so firmly entrenched in defending "their" viewpoint that arguing is futile. It is no wonder that our world is in such trouble - these issues are merely microcosms of our universal issues.

I certainly can't end this blog by telling you that I am glad it all happened and would do it over if I had to. I wouldn't. I am not glad it happened. I don't feel better off having uncovered the evils that I have. I will simply say that it was what is was; it happened; it hurt like hell, and now we are moving toward a new chapter in our lives.

Thank you so much to the many "virtual friends" who have followed our journey, prayed for us and the boys, and supported us in some of our darkest times. I hope you will join us on our new blog: www.bloomingbelly.blogspot.com.