Day 47

I am beginning to feel like I am trapped inside a movie set. The scenes are being played out convincingly by every member of the cast and I have only been placed here as an extra. I am not sure what to expect at any given moment as I have not been provided a script; I simply do what they tell me to do. With each new scene I attempt to anticipate what will happen next. I speculate, predict, infer – and yet when the action begins again I am always taken by surprise.

Many people have suggested this is a set-up. People insinuate that perhaps Inna wants money, but Inna plays only a small part in this show. She is a minor static character. More importantly, the motives of the main character, her Power of Attorney, are what I question. This man is in his mid-fifties and claims he was a friend of her parents. Considering that their character is not one of integrity, I can only deduce the same character of this man. So often we are prone to hypothesize a multitude of scandalous or exaggerated plots when it may indeed boil down to the simplest answer. This is what I struggle with every minute of the day: Is this simply a matter of Inna wanting the only thing she has in this world or is there more to this story than meets the eye? Unfortunately, if I take action based on the latter I could seriously misjudge and jeopardize our chances of getting Stephen. I am not only faced with my own conjectures, but those of all parties involved. Everyone has their angle.

I have sifted through countless legal documents. It appears that every one of the grounds cited by the prosecutor as means for termination of this adoption can be refuted. Of seven reasons outlined as justification for a child to be eligible for adoption, three of them apply in this case. You only need one! All of the steps articulated in the law pertaining to adoption of a minor child by foreigners have been followed precisely. This morning I confirmed that the one loophole I thought gave them the greatest advantage is not one they can use as we have the documentation to rebut that as well. The lawyer assisting me was even able to procure a statement from the police officers who removed Stephen from her custody!

There are a few other behind-the-scenes attempts being made to assure that Stephen is placed with us…but the moment of truth will be in that courtroom on April 18th. I wish I had a crystal ball. I wish that I had some peace of mind or comfort that God was going to show his hand in this, but I don’t. I am emotionally exhausted and mentally reaching a point of exasperation. I cannot accept that God has led us half way around the world after a grueling process only to have children capture our hearts and then be ripped away. God cannot be that cruel. For this to end with me getting on that plane alone and returning to an empty nursery only to begin again is just something I can’t fathom or accept as God’s will. One setback I can conquer. We have even endured a second enormous setback when we lost Stas; but for Stephen to remain here in an orphanage in hopes that his biological mother may someday be able to take him out is something I can’t wrap my mind around. That could not possibly be what God wants for this child.

Thank you for all of your e-mails and calls. Please continue to pray…and Karla, yes you may give that gals of CPAK my e-mail for the blog invite. I need prayer warriors!