Thursday, April 26, 2007

No News...

A new court date has not been set yet. We did find out, however, that this idiot POA can appeal the court's decision again if they rule in our favor at the next hearing. Hopefully, he will give up and let it go. With how things have gone for us to date I am sure he will appeal it again and drag this out a little bit longer (that is IF the court rules in our favor).

I feel so hopeless. You get to the point where you just don't want to deal with anything. Every aspect of this adoption has been out of our control from the start and you just keep telling yourself it will be worth it in the end. But what do you do when there is no end in sight? What do you do with the dream of a happy ending when it doesn't come? I've experienced disappointment and loss in my life before. I realize that life will go on no mater what happens, but I am growing tired of everything being an uphill battle.

12 comments:

Dana said...

"What do you do with the dream of the happy ending when it doesn't come?"

You try again! I know finances can make it difficult but you keep trying. You have plenty of time to realize your dreams. There are so many babies that need a home Dawn. Surely you are meant to be a mom to one of them.

There is still hope for Stephen. I am sorry to hear there can be another appeal. Hopefully your adoption will be granted and they will give up. I know I don't understand what you are feeling but I just refuse to believe that you will not be a mom someday (soon).

Thoughts are with you.

Meena

Melissa said...

I cant believe he can appeal it again. When will it ever be final. When do they finally cut out the bullshit?

Heidi said...

I'm so sorry. This has been horrible for you and I'm sorry you've had to go through this.

I have to agree with Meena- there are so many children out there that need a home. Maybe in a different country, maybe in Kaz. If money is an issue- we bloggers can come together and help you out. I'm sure we could come up with a creative way to help you fundraise. Maybe we could each ask everyone we know to donate one dollar. Everybody can afford to give that. If we could get 100 people to raise $100 that could be like $10,000 right? (math is not my gift)

Anyways, I'm still praying that Stephen comes home to you. Just know we are all here for you.

Dana said...

Heidi has a great idea. If all your supporters, and there are alot of us out there, could ask their families and friends to donate $1 that could really add up. Great idea Heidi!!

Meena

Unknown said...

With no end in sight and no guarantees there is nothing you can do but mourn the loss of the way you thought it would be. But there is Hope! There is hope in knowing that God knows your heart, He holds your tears in his hand. He has a plan and a purpose for your life and for the life of that child. Do no let go of the hope that might just work out in your favor, but also prepare your heart to be at peace no matter the outcome.
I know this is a difficult journey. While maybe we have not had as much heratbreak, we are now dealing with the unknown legal outcome of a custody decision in Russia. While I know just how difficult it is, try not to get paralyzed in this wait. I can tell you that it will probably take longer than they say. Just take one day at a time and look intentionally for what God is doing today - in your life, in the lives of others around you. All you have that is certain is this moment. Yesterday is a memory, tomorrow has no guarantees. Live today with purpose. That doesn't mean that you have to ignore your feelings and be happy-go-lucky despite the circumstances. Go ahead and cry, go ahead and ask God 'Why!", He is there for you. When you don't feel His presence or think He is listening that's OK too, just remember what he has said and what He had done in the past. Find scripture that you can cling to, find friends that you can cry with. But keep looking up. Lean not on your own understanding of the situation, God sees the bigger picture and He is working things for His glory.

Please take comfort in knowing that there are many people praying for you, myself included.

Esther said...

Well, when I was in the middle of our eight month fight to bring our little girl home from Russia, after her court paper work was completed......

I felt the same as you.

A friend told me to be very gentle with myself.

I told myself, "The sun will come out tomorrow." I suppose in a manner to say, I'll live thru this, this will come to pass, there will be another day.

It is very hard to get thru every day in the place you are in currently. Go with the thoughts my friend shared with me "Be gentle with yourself".

Nurture yourself. Be loving to yourself. ;o)

You are being lifted up in prayer.

Karla said...

Dear Dawn: well, you do exactly what you and Joe are doing...you take life one day at a time...and you try to "rest" in God's unfailing love, even when we can't see it or feel it or even really believe that it exists. However...it does...and, you will know it again at some point. And, in the same way that God always pursues us, you, too, at the right time, will pursue the blessing of children. Loving you in faith, Karla

The Heinrichs said...

Keep positive! You have inspired me and so many people...it makes me wonder if God is using you to be a "teacher" of how to handle the not so easy situations we may encounter with our adoptions. Hold onto our dream it may very well come true! I am praying that court date comes soon. If by chance we should be in KAZ when you need to go back you and your family are more than welcome to stay with us and use our driver translator etc. Honestly you should set up a paypal account on your website so we can donate to you...I told Brent I needed to find your address because I wanted to send you $50 so you could do whatever you please with it - save - splurge - invest - whatever!!! Think about it!!! We are all here to help! Hugs Deanna

Allison said...

Hello Dawn. I just wanted you to know that I'm still thinking about you and praying your difficult journey will end with Stephen in your arms.

Alli

Allison said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

I wish I knew the answer for you on what the future held. I know my hope and prayers are for that precious little boy to be given to you. I am sorry you have had to endure this...but as others have said....keep the faith. You have been a great example and we are praying for you both and that precious little boy.

Beckie

The Cook said...

Hang in there girl. I hope good news comes soon. i am thinking of you all the time.